Pirates be the fiercest bunch o' devil-dogs ye ever did see; tough as nails and fierce enough t’ make Beelzebub hisself think twice afore crossing ‘em, ye all know this to be true, aye? Aye!
What I bet ye didn’t know were that even the saltiest old pirate has a soft spot. One person who, be they alive, can stop even the fiercest rampage in its tracks. That’s right mates, I be referrin’ to a pirate’s mum.
Now, just t’ be clear, Ol’ Cap’n Graves has no mum; Ol’ Cap’n Graves sprung fully made straight from the deepest levels of th’ stygian pit an’ so has no need of a mum. I be an exception though, which be why we be settin’ aside a day or two to celebrate mothers all across th’ Caribbean!
Every pirate has a mother, an’ some pirates ARRR mothers! To ye all, I tip me enormous flamboyant hat. Yers be th’ harrrdest job of all. Had I a mum, I know I’d’ve caused her all kinds o’ grief, assuming she weren’t pirate herself, ha!
Davy Doubloon informs me that thanks to a generous contribution by a mysterious donor, thar be a limited supply o’ , available from peddlers across th’ seas, from Cuba t’ Padres del Fuego! Tattoo Bonita also told me that they be sellin’, fer a limited time, exclusive ! She also wanted me t’ extend the message that ye can expect
Happy Mother’s Day, mates; make sure ye show yer mums some love! Send a nice bouquet of flowers, an’ possibly a big fat bag o’ gold. A bottle o’ rum is never unappreciated either, arrrgh!
Take what ye can, and give nothin’ back!