OH, HELLO PIRATES! MERRY… WHAT? I’M TOO LOUD? BUT I CAN BARELY HEAR MESELF TALK.
Okay, fine. I’ll talk like this. But fair warnin’, I can’t hear a blasted thing I’m sayin’! So, why be Ol’ Gunner talkin’ to ye today? I bet ye thought that after the grand finale yesterday that the Brethren Court would be done, but oh no!
THEY’VE GOT A VERY SPECIAL BONUS GIFT FOR YE, AND IT GOES BOOM! HAHAHA! Oh, sorry. Too loud still? Drat.
Ye can now redeem a special Snow-Covered Grenade with the code SNOWNADE until January 2nd. But be warned, make sure yer inventory ain’t full! Ye best have a spot open, or ye’ll lose yer item! Although, methinks that shan’t be a problem since the recent expansion…
THESE BOMBS BE A FAVORITE OF MINE! Ye don’t see ‘em comin’. Ye’ll perplex yer foe by holdin’ a ball o’ snow in the middle of summer! Then, before they know it, BLAMMMOOOO! They’re gone… just like me eardrums!
Now, I bet yer wonderin’ how in Davy Jones’ Locker do we have SNOW in the Caribbean? Beats me! All I know is Tia Dalma put some special spell on this here snow. She muttered somethin' about a mood rock's colors? Told me ye may experience some color changes with this here weapon, but I didn't see anything. I may be near deaf, but I ain't color blind. Why she can’t put cast a spell to fix me ailin’ ears, I’ll never know.
NOW GO FORTH, PIRATES! ENJOY THE HOLIDAY SEASON! AND DON’T FORGET ME RUM! I’VE BEEN WAITIN’ FOREVER!